


All Over Again

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: BDSM, Bondage, M/M, dubcon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-05
Updated: 2016-05-05
Packaged: 2018-06-06 11:10:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6751615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean has fallen out of love with Sam since the whole Ruby and demon blood nonsense... But they've agreed to a different kind of relationship to try to repair what they may have lost.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All Over Again

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the SPN Writing Challenge song prompt: All Over Again - The Shires (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ly74jHxs4A8)

“You’re making it too easy to forgive you, Sam.” Dean’s voice was gruff as he strung the ropes a little tighter, binding Sam’s arms at the elbows. Sam winced.

 

“Then why am I still tied up?”

 

“Because forgiving you doesn’t translate to trusting you.”

 

“I slipped up, Dean. Once, and by accident,” Sam argued. Dean sighed and stepped back to check that all the bindings holding Sam in the center of the room were tight. Elaborate knots done with colorful rope broke up the expanses of Sam’s smooth skin. He was shaking, just a little, and Dean could already see sweat pouring down his forehead and bare thighs as he knelt on the hard concrete.

 

“Why did we start this relationship, Sam?” Dean asked, taking a seat in the only chair in the room – directly across from Sam.

 

“Because you couldn’t love me the way you did when we were kids after the way I betrayed you with Ruby and the demon blood – but you can’t hate me either – because we’ve always been closer than we should be. This type of relationship allowed us to fuck and share emotion, but gave you a way to punish me and control the situation if I got out of line again.” Sam spoke in a deadpan tone, having memorized the speech he was required to give every time he was punished. His knees and elbows already ached and his thighs were quivering with the strain that was manifesting, but he kept still – kept his eyes on Dean’s boots – and swore he’d be a good boy.

 

“So, what did you do to deserve punishment this evening?” Dean asked from the chair.

 

“I drank demon blood. By accident – but I didn’t make any effort to wipe it away.”

 

“Right. Now, I was going to leave you here a few hours but, God, Sam – every punishment is getting harder to dole out, you know.”

 

“I’m sorry. Could I do anything to make it easier?” Sam offered, trying to be perfectly submissive for his angry brother.

 

Dean shook his head. “No, no. It’s not you. Well, it is, but it’s nothing you’re doing wrong. To be honest, you’re proving yourself to me.”

 

Sam looked up, his expression surprised and full of hope, but he diverted his gaze back to the floor as soon as Dean flashed him a warning glare.

 

“I remember our first kiss, Sam, do you?”

 

“Yes, of course.” Sam had to smile a little at the memory before continuing, “I was thirteen and we were in the woods – Dad called it practicing our survival skills – but you always made it fun, like camping.”

 

“Because I knew you’d enjoy it more, and learn more, if you didn’t think of it as training,” Dean said wistfully and Sam nodded, his hair falling in front of his face.

 

“We were cuddled under that stupid fort you made for us out of the sticks and moss and you were trying to keep me warm.”

 

“You were all bones back then, you froze easy.” The memories slammed home into Dean, threatening to take his breath.

 

“You grabbed my face and pushed it into your neck to try and keep me from getting frostbite on my nose… But you smelled so damn good, I started kissing your neck.” Sam hesitated, smiling a little to himself.

 

“Do you know what my first thought was when you started kissing my neck like that, Sammy?” Dean’s voice was softer than usual, startling Sam worse than a shout would have.

 

“No,” he replied. Sam was well trained and he knew it – but he didn’t mind so much anymore. This was somewhat enjoyable at times.

 

“My first thought was: ‘my God, maybe I’m not gross for wanting him this way – maybe he wants me too’… I’d never felt so good about myself as I did in that second.” Dean admitted. “Until a second later when we actually kissed.”

 

Sam laughed a little. “I had no idea how to kiss, I know it was awful for you… I was all teeth and tongue.”

 

“No.” Dean rose and went down on his knees in front of Sam. He reached out and grabbed Sam’s chin, tilting it up so they were looking into each other’s eyes. “No, Sam. It was the _best_ kiss of my life, because it was you.”

 

Sam shivered at his words. Dean meant so much to him; more than he could ever explain – yet Sam hurt him in the worst way – by choosing a demon over him. Sam leaned forward, straining against the ropes for a kiss. He continued stare into Dean’s eyes, pleading with his own.

 

Dean smiled, stroking Sam’s cheek. “So needy.”

 

“I’m sorry, Dean.” Sam breathed, his voice shaking. “I’m so sorry, I keep hurting you, I’m sorry, I never meant to and I know that means nothing –“

 

“Shh.” Dean scowled and covered Sam’s mouth with his palm. “I know you’re sorry. You’ve tried again and again to prove it, I just—I’ve been too stubborn to let you, you know?”

 

“Do you – can you – forgive me? Ever?” Sam let his head fall forward as he spoke, hiding his expression from Dean.

  
“I already have, Sammy.”

 

Sam looked up quickly, his eyes round, “You have?”

 

“Yes. Of course. I can’t stay mad at my pain in the ass little brother.” Dean stroked Sam’s hair behind his ears. “I just had a hard time trusting you. But… Sam, you know you’re my baby boy, right? I haven’t said that enough lately.”

 

Sam looked back down. “I feel like I destroyed any chance we had of ever going back to what we were. After you went to hell, I just—“

 

Dean covered Sam’s mouth with two of his fingers; smiling a little and turning Sam’s head back up to look at him. “Hey. Don’t do that. I already said I forgave you.”

 

Sam smiled, leaning into the touch. “You know, I’m glad we did this,” Dean continued. Sam cocked his head, a clear request for his big brother to continue explaining.

 

“All this BDSM stuff, you know? I think – I think it made me remember why I fell in love with you when we were kids. It made me fall back in love with you, I guess.”

 

The smile that lit up Sam’s face was enough to make Dean remember exactly what he loved about Sam when they were kids, after Sam returned from Stanford, every second of it – and his heart swelled.

 

“My Sammy.” He breathed, leaning forward and kissing Sam hard. “I’m so sorry.” He whispered against Sam’s mouth. “We got so caught up in this stupid life that I forgot how important you are to me, and I am so sorry.”

 

Sam shook his head, fighting against his bindings for the first time since they’d been tied. He wanted nothing more than to hold Dean – to make it okay.

“No,” he whispered when he couldn’t free himself. “Don’t be sorry. I deserved this – deserve this.” He leaned back as far as he could and smiled at Dean. “And I kind of like it.”

 

“Really? You do?”

 

Sam nodded, “I do. Even if you think we can go back to the way we were, I mean, a little… I’d like to continue this, if you’ll have me?” His eyes were shining, pleading with Dean.

 

Dean grinned and reached up, fisting Sam’s hair before he jerked his head back. “Yeah? You like being my perfect little boy?” He growled.

 

“Yes.” Sam panted. “Yes sir.”

 

Dean leaned forward and kissed Sam, taking the opportunity to bite his bottom lip. “Then beg for me, baby boy.” He whispered – and Sam began to beg.


End file.
